Gratitude

It is cold out. So cold, I can feel the hairs in my nose begin to freeze, see my breath in white clouds. My heart this morning is filled with this ebullient sense of gratefulness.  How did I get this lucky? Why? Then it hits me. Why question it. Instead, pass it on.

Growing Up

Both my little beans are growing up quickly. I can hardly get over the fact that they will be 9 and 4 this year. As independent as they are, thankfully, they still like to hang out with mom for a bit.

This past fall while I was immersed in a mountain of laundry, my flat-chested eldest sneaks behind me and  asked me when I was planning on getting her a bra. A bra?  Who has to wear a bra in the second grade?

ME: LB, do you know what a bra is for?
LB: Yeah, to cover your boobies (Where she gets this from, I don't even know.  These have been known as breasts, mommy milk, and occasionally boobs).
ME: Actually, they are to help support your breasts as they get fuller. Yours don't look like they quite need support. Does someone in your class wear a bra?
LB: Yes. AA and BB do.
ME; Thinking. These girls are not very developed, so it seems a bit odd to me. "Say, do they wear a sports bra?"
LB: Yes, how did you know?
ME: Well, I guessed. (But in my head, I began to think that maybe we should consider having more discussions about the body

So, in the last few weeks, we have begun having impromptu conversations about periods and changing bodies (much to the chagrin of my brothers-only husband). I had bought this book at a second hand shop a while back and since I was re-organizing my desk again, I found it and decided to give it to LB to have  a look.



I did not give it a thorough perusal, but as a mom and a clinician, it seemed developmentally appropriate for an 8 year old to start learning about her body and the monthly cycles that will ensue in the next few years.  I liked this book, because it did not introduce sex yet.

Ladybug seemed to gravitate to this book she had chosen it to be read at bedtime one night over break.  So instead of reading Geronoimo Stilton or the Berenstein Bears, there we were, Ladybug in one arm, Honeypie in the other, lightly skimming Period before bed.  Both were interested in the illustrations of the female body (which are cartoons), and thereby I think, less scary. Neither girl seemed embarrassed to ask questions, which was great.

Fast forward to yesterday's conversation. LB and I are coming home from the City. A billboard before us states that "Over 100,000 children are in Foster Care, waiting to be adopted."
ME: Whoa, that's sad.
LB: What, Mom?
ME: That billboard over there.
LB: (She reads the billboard). Mom, why don't people like kids?
ME: Well, it's not that a lot of people don't like kids.  Perhaps they have them at too young of an age, like in their teens.
LB: But mom, you said that people don't get married until they are older.  How can they have kids if they are a teenager?
ME: Well, some people make decisions in their teen years that result in them having a baby before they are married.
LB: Mom, the kids at school say you have to have a boy and a girl to have a baby. Is that right?
ME: (Keeping hands on the wheel and eyes on the road) Well, to have a baby, you need a boy and a girl, but to raise a baby you can have many family types. Some families have two mommies, some two daddies, some a Grandma, others like ours have a Mommy and a Daddy.

From here, we went on to discuss what our Faith Tradition teaches, but not before I inquired;
ME: Say, LB, do the kids at school talk about how a baby is made?
LB: No.  And if they did, I would not participate.
ME: Well, if they do, please come to me and ask.  I want to make sure that you get the right information. OK?
LB: Sure, Mom. You know everything about the body.
ME: Well, I don't know about that, but I do know more than your classmates.


Meanwhile, her little sister wants to be a Daddy when she grows up. More to investigate for another time.

Always another way to look at things. . .

Ladybug

Last week, we were visiting the Great Lake State to see the 'rents, sisters, and cousins. Middle C and I took some of the kids out to walk around the mall.  Admittedly, the mall there is very, very small.  So, on the way home, some of the houses we were passing were also very small.  Imagine my surprise when Ladybug piped up:

Ladybug: Mom, what kinds of houses are these?
Me: Kinds of houses?  What do you mean?
Ladybug: I mean, do they have electricity?

Now, the houses weren't that small and they certainly did not look that old.  But I was curious.

Me: Ladybug, what makes you think that they lack electricity?
Ladybug: Well, Mom, the sign over there says, 'No Outlet.'

Honeypie

Let's just say that she has begun to develop her artistic talents.  Apparently, I look like a frog with lots of hair.

Lips

Last week I attended my daughter's parent-teacher conference.  She had been all excited for me to see her artwork which featured an Egyptian mummy.  This is the daughter for whom drawing is a pain.  It requires her to sit still and movement is where she finds solace.

Well, we entered the school and there, on the wall was her mummy.  It was beautifully colored and it looked like she had spent a considerable amount of time on it.  Admittedly, the first thing that we noticed were the lips.  They were fairly large, but it seemed to flow.

When we arrived home, I told her how proud of her that I was and that we saw her picture.

Ladybug: I went a little crazy on the lips, though.
Me: What makes you say that?
Ladybug: I just did.
Me: Did someone say something to you?  I thought your picture was great just the way it was. 
Ladybug: No, I just do.

Which got me thinking.  Why would she have made the lips so big?  Artistic license?  Uncertain boundaries? 

Or maybe, she feels the need to be heard! Bigger lips, more voice?  Crazy linkage on my part.  However, maybe today, I will make a better effort to hear what comes out of those lips.

Post in my brain. . .

Sometimes I am worried that I am not going to remember some of the most heartfelt moments in my life.  Things that I have really enjoyed in the last month that I want to solidify in my brain include:

1. Attending the Emerald Ball with D and staying at the Gwen overnight.
2. Watching Inside Out with my family this weekend.
3. Raking leaves with Honeypie on Sunday and playing stop and go on her bike.  She almost ran me over several times, rode her bike through my leaf piles and then laughed like crazy.  It was exhilarating. 
4. Mowing the lawn on Sunday while Ladybug attempted a cardboard box sculpture for our cats.
5. Having a dance party with H and L upstairs.  We danced to Shake it Off, All about the Base, What's going on (4 Non-Blondes) and others.  While D did not participate, he actually came into watch for a bit.  Both girls were out of control and really having a great time.  So was their mom. 
6. Snuggling with both girls at various times in the night.