Monday, January 11, 2016

Growing Up

Both my little beans are growing up quickly. I can hardly get over the fact that they will be 9 and 4 this year. As independent as they are, thankfully, they still like to hang out with mom for a bit.

This past fall while I was immersed in a mountain of laundry, my flat-chested eldest sneaks behind me and  asked me when I was planning on getting her a bra. A bra?  Who has to wear a bra in the second grade?

ME: LB, do you know what a bra is for?
LB: Yeah, to cover your boobies (Where she gets this from, I don't even know.  These have been known as breasts, mommy milk, and occasionally boobs).
ME: Actually, they are to help support your breasts as they get fuller. Yours don't look like they quite need support. Does someone in your class wear a bra?
LB: Yes. AA and BB do.
ME; Thinking. These girls are not very developed, so it seems a bit odd to me. "Say, do they wear a sports bra?"
LB: Yes, how did you know?
ME: Well, I guessed. (But in my head, I began to think that maybe we should consider having more discussions about the body

So, in the last few weeks, we have begun having impromptu conversations about periods and changing bodies (much to the chagrin of my brothers-only husband). I had bought this book at a second hand shop a while back and since I was re-organizing my desk again, I found it and decided to give it to LB to have  a look.



I did not give it a thorough perusal, but as a mom and a clinician, it seemed developmentally appropriate for an 8 year old to start learning about her body and the monthly cycles that will ensue in the next few years.  I liked this book, because it did not introduce sex yet.

Ladybug seemed to gravitate to this book she had chosen it to be read at bedtime one night over break.  So instead of reading Geronoimo Stilton or the Berenstein Bears, there we were, Ladybug in one arm, Honeypie in the other, lightly skimming Period before bed.  Both were interested in the illustrations of the female body (which are cartoons), and thereby I think, less scary. Neither girl seemed embarrassed to ask questions, which was great.

Fast forward to yesterday's conversation. LB and I are coming home from the City. A billboard before us states that "Over 100,000 children are in Foster Care, waiting to be adopted."
ME: Whoa, that's sad.
LB: What, Mom?
ME: That billboard over there.
LB: (She reads the billboard). Mom, why don't people like kids?
ME: Well, it's not that a lot of people don't like kids.  Perhaps they have them at too young of an age, like in their teens.
LB: But mom, you said that people don't get married until they are older.  How can they have kids if they are a teenager?
ME: Well, some people make decisions in their teen years that result in them having a baby before they are married.
LB: Mom, the kids at school say you have to have a boy and a girl to have a baby. Is that right?
ME: (Keeping hands on the wheel and eyes on the road) Well, to have a baby, you need a boy and a girl, but to raise a baby you can have many family types. Some families have two mommies, some two daddies, some a Grandma, others like ours have a Mommy and a Daddy.

From here, we went on to discuss what our Faith Tradition teaches, but not before I inquired;
ME: Say, LB, do the kids at school talk about how a baby is made?
LB: No.  And if they did, I would not participate.
ME: Well, if they do, please come to me and ask.  I want to make sure that you get the right information. OK?
LB: Sure, Mom. You know everything about the body.
ME: Well, I don't know about that, but I do know more than your classmates.


Meanwhile, her little sister wants to be a Daddy when she grows up. More to investigate for another time.


2 comments:

  1. *Snort* I want to be a daddy too. They have it way easier.

    ReplyDelete
  2. *Snort* I want to be a daddy too. They have it way easier.

    ReplyDelete